Week Four - Recovering a sense of integrity.
Working with the morning pages, we begin to sort through the differences between our real feelings, ones we keep to ourselves, and official feelings, those on display to others. Official feelings are usual signaled by the phrase: I feel okay about that. You begin to stop saying it's okay when in fact it's something else something more specific.
Many tend to neglect or abandon the morning pages just when an unpleasant piece of clarity is about to emerge. You will also notice that during this time you become irritable. The morning pages have become habit, and when you do not write them you will become crabby.
Through the morning pages, you will find clarity. Clarity creates change. You may find in your morning pages, "I've out grown this job." This begins as a troubling perception but overtime it will call for action and then an action plan. The morning pages raise our subconscious and allow us to learn what we want.
A sure sign that you are connecting with yourself, is the need to throw out the old, tossing papers, giving away old clothes, etc. You will find a change in your energy patterns, you will begin remember your dreams and find yourself easily lost in your daydreams. Your tastes and judgments will change. Your identity will begin to shine through as you find yourself.
You will feel the need to rest as you are moving ahead so rapidly. Learn to rest in motion. Your morning pages are a time of rest. Mindless activities, such as dishes and hanging clothes, are a time for rest.
Affirmations to try this week:
I receive your goodwill willingly.
I trust my own perceptions.
Now, I know no one is ready for this, least of all me. Do the best you can with this.
A controversial artist's tool is reading deprivation. Yes, no reading for a week!
Cast yourself into your inner silence and allow your inner voice to be heard. The result will be a new outflow of your own art and your own thoughts and feelings. This is a very powerful tool and a frightening one. You ask, "What will I do?" Listen to music, crochet, exercise, meditate, entertain, re pot plants. Eventually you will run out of work and be forced to play.
Extra exercise for today: List 5 hobbies that sound fun.
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